What Should I do?
What do you do when people don't treat you the way you treat them?
I have this friend whose name is Blessing and back in the day, there was a time when we used to talk everyday on the phone. Blessing and I were basically best of friends then even though we lived thousands of kilometres apart. We had both met in high school but life happened and everyone went their separate ways.
Back then, whenever we spoke on the phone, we mostly talked about things happening in our lives at the moment (that was our way of including one another in our lives) and I remember one time she had been really upset because of the way the people she called her friends were treating her. And one day she had told me that she feels like her kind of person shouldn't be in this current generation where people take things for granted because she's the kind of lady that would always go extra mile for her friends just to see them happy and yet none of them would do the same for her.
You might be wondering why I'm saying all of this, well it's because I seem to be in the same situation. I'm the kind of guy that would do my best for my friends but sadly, I don't think some of them would do the same for me. You see, some of my friends have been in difficult situations before and they had called on me to help, which I did immediately. Whatever the problem was, I always made sure to see to it that they got a solution to it, one that ended in their favour. But I don't think that would be the case for me if the situations were reversed.
I'm a very observant person, I notice a lot of things around me even the tiniest of things, especially a person's behaviour in certain situations and based on experience, I've come to know that those behaviours become more and more obvious based on how serious the situation is and sadly, the behaviors I've been getting from some of them hasn't been a good one.
It gives me this feeling that they might not be there for me the way I've been there for them when the time comes and thinking about that is scary, because I believe that calling someone your friend means that you should be able to count on them on certain situations, if not all situations.
So what should I do. Should I talk to them about these things, although it will be pretty easy for them to deny it seeing how they haven't done those things yet (because I haven't been in a serious situation yet where I needed their help) or do I just ignore and just move on like I haven't noticed anything?
Because at the end of the day, I could be wrong about this whole thing.
I have that experience but I already overcome the situation and I can suggest you something for it.
I think there is no need to stop talking with them. If they ask for help then, you can help if you are free and no fixed schedule or it's too much emergency. The most important thing you need to say "No". Practice it, it's not easy to say but it's needed for you.
I actually do know how to say No.. I dedicated a certain period of my life learning to say it and I like to think that I've perfected the act of saying no.. I'm just not the kind of guy to not help when I know I can.
It depends on the kind of person your friend is. There are some people you will talk to about things like this and they will be angry so it depends. And make sure that you talk politely if at all you want to do that
Lol.. I can be polite but that is only if I want to. Because thinking about it, if I happen to be right about this whole thing, then there's nothing to be polite about.
This is what I keep thinking in life and there is a lot of sadness. It should be given, otherwise a person will go into depression and anxiety every day.