Looking at things from a different pov
Last week, I had written a blog post talking about how most African parents want to be in charge of their kids life and also wants to influence every decision they make for as long as possible, irrespective of their kids age. Now although that is true, I feel like the only reason why I have a huge problem with it is because I'm looking at the whole thing from the child's perspective.
Lately, I've thinking about some of these things but from the parent's POV and I found myself kinda seeing things their way. As a parent, it has got to hurt seeing your kids deciding that they're adults and no longer have to follow all of your commands.
The other day I was seeing this show where this dad was ordering his son not to go out with a particular lady and the kid had reminded his dad that he was now eighteen years old and no longer a kid and could date whoever he wanted. That immediately shut his dad up and the man went from ordering to asking calmly. Now although that would never work here, especially if the kid is just past eighteen years old (my dad would lift me up and give me a smackdown if I spoke to him that way), there comes a certain age where we do get to tell our parents things like that but in a more respectful manner because you still could get smacked at anytime.
But if your parents understand that the time where they get to order you around with no questions asked from you is over, they would eventually do what is right, which is to let you do you, although it might not be easy for them, they don't have a choice.
Well, I say all of that to say this, as a parent, if my kids do decide to want to go against my teachings, as long as it has nothing to do with crime or something immoral, then maybe, maybe I just might be considerate enough to let them do things their way, although it's not guaranteed.
Though it's not like I can really do much to stop them if they're grown and now adults because at that age, they can do whatever they want without having to tell me anything about it and even if I do find out about it, the only thing I can do is try to talk some sense into them and hope that they respect me well enough to listen to what I say, because there really isn't much I can do if they decide to do otherwise.
But all of that depends on their age though because if they're still below the age of thirty, then I still can give them smackdown every now and then because why not. But on a more serious note, it's things like this that just makes you understand why most parents always want to be in charge because they fear their kids might end up doing something wrong, which is very understandable.
Haha 😆😆😂😂
Lmao 🤣...our upcoming typical African parent prayzz
I sight you bro..why not, smacking down must always happen when they feel they have arrived, lolz
Oh Jesus..the thing is that, you gat to constantly educate them on certain things and always pray for them to live responsibly. Then whenever they come up with something about deviation, be patience enough to hear their viewpoint, then guide them politely and with wisdom... sometimes, if you insist, they will still go and do what they want at your back. It's totally hard to control an adult... personally I will deeply feel hurt if my child is deviating negatively without taking correction.
I also agree with everything you've said Nkem.. And what's even more painful is the fact that when they get to a certain age, all you can do is just talk, even if they end up still doing what they want. It's painful but there's little to nothing a parent can do then.
Lol, 18 is also like a new born baby in my family as well.
Well yes, it is right to oppose them when you have doubts they will end up doing something wrong.
Thank you for reading.
Lol, I was nodding my head until I got to that smackdown part🤣, be calming down.
And yes, parents can only try their best to put their kids on the right path and the rest solely depends on the child. You can force a horse to go to the river, but you can not force it to drink from it.
Lol. I was only stating the facts 😂
I see 🤣
If an adult person decides to walk in a different way then no one can stop him. It's the reality. If someone wants to stop him the result will be the opposite in most cases. I think I need to agree with you, Unless a kid is doing something wrong, we may accept it and we need to be flexible for it.
Kids should be made to understand the effects of their actions whether positive or negative. When the repercussions of the available choices are laid bare to them, it helps to get them on track. Many times, lack of proper communication add to the problem.
Lack of communication is correct bro.. But sometimes, it's just stubbornness and them thinking they know better.
well we all have the right to live our life the way we want to be. you are vert right we must respect their decision until unless their is nothing to do with crime or something immoral.
Yeah.
Thanks for reading.