How does one break free and really be independent?
About some few weeks ago, I was on the phone with my dad and he basically had called to know when I planned on moving back home since I was now done with school. But I've never really had any plans on returning back home after school, my plan has always been to start life from here and just keep on moving forward because to me, going back home seems like I'm taking a step backward.
So I had told him of my plans on not returning home, I could always visit but I had no plans on staying for long and although he seemed a bit reluctant to accept at first, he eventually did but that wasn't until he tried advising me and making me see reasons why traveling back home was the right move to make.
I happen to be the third son of four boys and I'm currently in my mid twenties but for some weird reasons, my old man still feels like it's way too early for me to leave home and be independent. He had used my brothers as examples, telling me about how they never left home until they both got to the age of twenty-seven. I'm not gonna lie, majority of the things he said made sense to me but my mind was already made up so I had politely declined returning back home.
Although aside from the fact that I wanted freedom, I didn't have enough reason to want to be away from home, but now I think I do. That phone call happened about ten weeks ago and ever since then, whenever my old man calls, the first thing he asks me is where are you? To which I always answer honestly, I'm at home because I hate lying to him and I'm always at home.
At first I didn't think much about it because it just felt like a standard way of a parent checking in on their kid but now that I think about it, based on how constantly he always asks that question whenever he calls, I think my old man is having problems accepting the fact that I'm way past that age and that whatever power he may have had over me back when I still was a kid was beginning to dwindle.
I feel like he needs to realize that and I also need to realize that myself and start acting like the man I am because earlier today, someone had brought up the idea of us traveling to a different state to go on a three day vacation and although I bought into the idea and told them I was in, I found myself worrying about my dad who lives thousands of miles away.. "What if he calls and asks where I was, what would I say?" I had thought to myself.
That was when I realized how much hold he still has on me and that I need to break free.. Maybe not break free entirely, but enough to be able to want to go on vacation and not worry about what he would think about it.