Promoting self-esteem in kids
Teaching children to value, respect and treat each other with great affection is the key to their proper development..
Helping the little ones in the house to build proper self-esteem is one of the most important activities that parents have. In them falls the role of teaching them how to value, respect and treat each other with affection, this being a great key during the first years of life.
Parents are the most important people who have children. They are the ones who exert the greatest influence in the complicated but wonderful task of knowing themselves; They are the mainstay from the moment the world is discovered and to whom we turn when we cannot find outlets. Parents are the ones who provide the mirror to start the process of recognizing ourselves. For this reason, it is very important that they begin to cultivate the acceptance process in children....
The need to feel safe
Often, children often seek the approval of their parents, whose purpose is to feel loved and accepted. They need to know that they agree with them and that they have permission to feel confident about themselves.
The purpose here is to teach them to moderate that need and thus little by little they will become more autonomous and independent. However, the problem may lie when it becomes very intense and lasts over the years, since a kind of codependency can be generated by the approval of others when acting.
In such a way, when parents accept their children as they are, appreciate and value them , they create a psychological shield that will allow them to protect themselves for life. However, this is unfortunately not always the case. Not all parents have the capacity to meet the emotional needs of their children. Despite this, the wonderful and beloved art of acceptance can always be learned, even in the adult stage.
In another aspect, it must be taken into account that children are like a kind of sponge, that is, they learn from their parents; from the behaviors they see in them, to the words they usually say or the gestures they have. Now, if all these elements have love, affection and security as a conduit; children will internalize that they are loved, valued and respected. In short, these will be the first lessons of worth and good self-esteem that you will have.
It is important to be clear that acceptance is not synonymous with resignation, that is, at certain times it is necessary to establish certain limits in the education of children and the most important thing is that the message that they are accepted as is should not be stopped. as they are; thus recognizing their strengths and weaknesses.
Now, if children come to be treated from aggressiveness, contempt or indifference, they will feed within them hopelessness, feelings of abandonment and rejection. For this reason, they will learn that they are not loved, but invisible and their self-esteem will be damaged.
For all this, the following is very important :
✓ Acknowledge the potential instead of frequently pointing out their mistakes. It is important to note that this does not mean that parents should not do it, but it should always be from an opportunity perspective in order to grow.
✓ You should avoid creating expectations about your future, behaviors and way of being.
✓ Listen to them and be interested in what they want to share, in the same way, ask them questions and make them participate in the activities.
✓ Validate and acknowledge your emotions. If we classify their feelings as "bad" or, failing that, we make them deny or repress them, the result that will be obtained will be low self-esteem, insincere behavior and a total loss of connection with their feelings. For this reason, parents should value the full range of emotions that their children experience, rather than only the positive aspects.
To conclude, it is very important that parents avoid telling them how they should feel, nor should they compare them with their peers, use sarcasm, threaten and punish them as a kind of repercussion towards their feelings because by doing so, the only thing they will be promoting is denial or concealment how they can feel....